Six Valentine’s Resolutions for Struggling Relationships

When we marry, we hope to remain happily married until death, yet that is not the experience that most of us have. Yes, most of us who get married will stay married, but to rekindle love in your relationship and have committed relationship generally include plenty of significant bumps and bruises. Here are some statistics to ponder:
* Information from the National Science Foundation suggests that in any given year about 12% of men and 7% of women say they have had sex outside of their marriage.
* As many as one in three couples struggles because one partner has a low sex drive
* Marriage research suggests that the first year of marriage includes a significant decrease in marital satisfaction and that in the years thereafter happiness continues to decline, though at a less steep rate
* More than two dozen studies since the early 1980s have demonstrated that marital happiness and relationship quality fall precipitously once couples have children
* New parents have eight times the number of arguments that non-parents have
* Marital dysfunction rates for couples in which one partner has ADHD are almost 60%
* Unemployment, one of the most stressful factors in a relationship, remains above 9%.
University of Texas sociologist, Norval Glenn, projects that about 24% of married couples will remain very happily married until death. That leaves a lot of the rest of us struggling with how we might actually make things better when Valentine’s Day rolls around. For a truly meaningful Valentine’s Day, don’t focus on a single romantic gesture. Instead, consider making Valentine’s Day the ‘New Years’ of romance – a time for making resolutions that will create lasting change for your relationship and rekindle love in your Relationship.
The good news?

There is science behind how to do this.

Here are six resolutions that can make your relationship matter for a change:

  • We will teach ourselves to argue. Significant marital research suggests that couples who argue using the right words, who are conscious of how to start and end a conversation, and who avoid accusatory, critical or harsh rhetoric in the middle can use disagreement to strengthen their marriage, rather than weaken it.

So forget about what you are fighting about and focus instead about how you disagree. Healthy conflict puts you on a path to resolve your differences and help you to rekindle love in your relationship. Unproductive conflict, or avoiding conflict all together, means that your problems don’t get solved, only aggravated.

  • We will eliminate ‘pursuit -retreat’ patterns in our relationship. You know these patterns – one partner is eager to confront problems while the other dreads these conversations and retreats. Research by Sarah Holley of Berkeley suggests that this is not gender-based behaviour that might indicate that the problem is intractable, but rather an issue of who has power in the relationship.

So figure out who that is by observing who has conversational dominance, then seek ways to more evenly respect the needs and power of each member of the couple.

  • We will change the proportion of positive interactions to negative ones. University of Washington researchers, including John Gottman, have determined that healthy relationships include at least five times more positive interactions than negative ones.

So every time you create a negative reaction in your relationship, you need to self-consciously make up for it by creating five positive ones! Saying ‘I’m sorry’ is a good start, but it’s only 1/5th of the work you need to do to rekindle love in your relationship

  • We will address ADHD in our relationship. If you have a child with ADHD, patterns of significant inconsistency in at least one spouse, chronic nagging and anger, or egregiously disproportionate distribution of responsibilities in your relationship the ADHD may be creating serious problems for you. Learning how ADHD impacts adult relationships will help you overcome the many challenges you currently face.
  • We will schedule time to connect. In the age of connection our relationships suffer from too many distractions. A good way to start to repair the disconnection and damage that this causes is to regularly schedule time to focus on each other. It can be a weekly date night, spending every Saturday afternoon just banging around together, or creating a half-hour window of time to talk or be together every night at the time that the spouse who goes to bed earliest is ready to retire.

It may not sound romantic, but research suggests that creating time to connect will both improve your relationship and provide long-lasting health benefits to you both.

Ever consider taking tango lessons? Going on a road trip to a new place? Learning a new sport? All of these things could help the two of you reconnect and improve your relationship and thereby help to rekindle love in your relationship.

As a marriage consultant and the author of The ADHD Effect on Marriage, Melissa Orlov specializes in helping couples impacted by ADHD improve their struggling relationships and learn to thrive. She blogs for Psychology Today, is the relationship columnist for ADDitude Magazine and has been interviewed for The New York Times, CNN, Today, US News and World Report and more.
More information:
For Better: The Science of a Good Marriage by Tara Parker-Pope
The ADHD Effect on Marriage by Melissa Orlov and/or the blog at
http://www.adhdmarriage.com/

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Tips to Rekindle the Romance Fire in Your Relationship

Are you wondering what had happened to your relationship of late and you are feeling that you need to rekindle the romance fire in your relationship. Hardly could you imagine where to start. Just pause a little and look around you will discover that it is easier than you might think.

It is dangerous if you delay any further, do something about it today, a stitch in time they say saves nine. Get yourself challenged and look for the secrets for rekindling the romance in your relationship.

Keeping romance alive in a long-term relationship is not only healthy but always necessary it is possible to make it the longer the sweeter if you put in place all that is necessary for the fire to be burning always.

When your relationship is kept in top shape you will discover that the act of rekindling the fire of romance is real fun and excitement, eventually the benefit proves to be double gain. I can assuredly recommend this resource that had help in sustaining several marriages over the years. You can CLICK HERE to have a look at it

Don’t waste time, procrastination they say is a thief of time, do something today.  Do not procrastinate! The time in now, start today!

Do you know why I am happy?

It is the fact that it is never too late and you are never too old to rekindle the romance fire in your relationship!

So let’s get going, let’s hit the nail on the 3 simple Secrets To Ignite The Flame

  • Create Time For Romance

Nothing good come without effort so you have to make time for romance! Get   out your calendar!

Have some special days aside from Valentine’s Day and your anniversary, it is necessary that you commit time to your partner in more ways than one.

  • Do it Again, “Start Dating Your Partner AGAIN”

You did it once and it worked, you got her and in marriage, so if you try it again it will definitely work. Take time to add some mystery and fun back into your relationship with a few creative dating ideas. Get seclusive and enjoy the times spent together again. With this you will easily rekindle the romance fire in your relationship

  • Rekindle Your Sex Life As In The Days Gone By

Yes, I mean your sex life!

Get back a strong sexual relationship, this  is possible and it could be obtained at any age!

It is great that sexual pleasure does not come with an expiration date! You can get it at will.

These are the simple ideas tossed to you it is a solid ground to start rekindling the fire of romance, though they are simple but the magic could be done if only and if you take time to implement them.

If you are interested in having additional information click here to download a free ebook

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Ways to rekindle romance Fire in Marriage by Julie Spira

I believe in creating rituals in relationships to reignite a spark. Having a regular date night not only enhances your relationship, but it gives you something exciting to look forward to and help you to rekindle romance fire in your marriage.

  • Try to have your “date night” the same night of the week every week and take turns as a couple in deciding who should make the plans for the date night.

  • Incorporate some date night foreplay, and leave a love note on the pillow in the morning or send a text message letting your partner know that you are excited about seeing them later in the evening, you will surprised at how this will help to rekindle romance fire in your marriage.

 

  • Decide together what subjects are “off limits” on date night. Perhaps you take a break from talking about the kids, finances and work problems. Make it all about you and leave the boardroom out of the bedroom. Let all to be done be specially centred around what will help you to rekindle romance Fire in your relationship

It will be a great help to your relationship if you can CLICK HERE to download a free ebook that can give further tips on how to keep the fire burning always.

Julie Spira

Bestselling author, Dating and relationship expert

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Ways to Rekindle the Old Flame of Romance by Elizabeth R. Lombardo, Ph.D., M.S., P.T

  • Prioritize Your Relationship:

Make a genuine commitment to each other (and yourself) to enhance the romance in your relationship. You must have the strong desire to make this happen; it won’t just magically occur. With that being said, if you both are devoted to this goal, the sky’s the limit on how steamy things can get. You will be amazed to see how easy will it be for you to rekindle the old flame of romance in your relationship

  • Address The Stress:

Feeling overwhelmed, overworked and underappreciated are key ingredients to depleting libido. As individuals and a couple, take steps to reduce stress and improve overall sentiments about yourself and your partner.

Express gratitude when your partner does something to help you out, call them during the day to tell them you love them, keep things in perspective (e.g., your relationship is more important that working the extra 45 minutes that will make you late getting home), exercise together (a great way to reduce stress and boost libido). With less stress and more appreciation for your partner, you both will start to enjoy each other more and want to improve your romantic life.

  • See What’s in the Cookie Jar

Try this exercise. Have each partner write out 15-20 romantic things they would like to do (quiet dinner, bathe together in candlelight, role-playing a specific fantasy). Then each week, choose an evening that you will carry out one of these items. Have one person randomly pull out a paper with the event on it- and go to town.

The power of the exercise could be experienced by those that put it to practice. Soon it becomes something that the couple will be looking forward to and no doubt it will help to rekindle the old flame of romance in your love life

Issue of rekindling romance fire in relationship demands some effort which when applied will make bliss of the relationship. Some of the tips are given in this article. For additional resources you can Click Here
Elizabeth R. Lombardo, Ph.D., M.S., P.T
Author of the bestselling book “A Happy You: Your Ultimate Prescription for Happiness,”
Psychologist & Physical Therapist
1000 Brooktree Road, Suite 300
Wexford, PA 15090
214.236.9533
Fax: 214.242.2267
DrL@AHappyYou.com
http://www.AHappyYou.com

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How to rekindle the romance in your relationship by Karen Sherman, Ph.D

  • First, the attitude must be one that accepts the notion that the romance can be rekindled. This is very important in that the couple must see the need to rekindle the romance in the relationship and is the reason why it is the opening point. In as much as you are convinced that the relationship could and should be restored to romance flame, it does not take much to rekindle the fire. All that goes into rekindling the fire will be more of fun than effort.

 

  • One of the best ways to get going is to reminisce about the beginning of the relationship. The use of old photos is very helpful. This automatically helps in bring to mind the way you feel at the beginning of your relationship. You will discover that very soon all that existed in your relationship will be restored.

 

  • Start to do the very types of things you did in the beginning when things were romantic. Even if you don’t actually feel them, do it anyway … attitude often follows behaviour. It is question of time before the sizzling  romance fire in your relationship is rekindled

To obtain additional resources that will reignite the fire of romance in your relationship click here to download a free ebook

Karen Sherman, Ph.D. Psychologist/Author/Internet Expert/Professor

Education: Ph.D., Fordham University, 1989

Memberships/Certifications:
American Psychological Association
American Counselling Association
Nassau County Psychologists Association
Nationally Board Certified Counsellor
National Family Life Educator

Media Experience: Extensive radio (including XM and sirius) and cited as expert in newspapers and journals (e.g. Men’s Health, Self, Family Circle, Crain’s NY, Women’s World, Glamour, L.I. Newsday)

e-Mail: DrK723@aol.com
www.drkarensherman.com

 

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15 Powerful Love Quotes to Rekindle the love Your In Relationship

The collection of some great love quotes is for Love letters, text messages, love notes and love cards personified.

Great Love Quotes on Valentine’s Day, Anniversary days and Special days can speak volumes since they can convey your emotions in a few words, rather than in long, meticulous verses.

Beside this are powerful resources that can easily prevent break up in your relationship. CLICK HERE for a dependable and reliable resource that can help you to re-ignite the passion in your Relationship so that you never have to worry about being dumped.

A great thing about love quotes is that it often speaks indirectly. This could be of great help too if you are the type that is embarrassed to blurt out your feelings directly, All you need to do is just to help yourself with some love quotes.

  • Doubt that the stars are fire, doubt that the sun doth move, doubt truth to be a liar, but never doubt I love.
    ~ William Shakespeare

  • Your words are my food, your breath is my wine.
    You are everything to me.

    ~Sarah Bernhardt

  • Through all eternity to thee
    A joyful song I’ll raise,
    For oh! Eternity is too short
    To utter all thy praise.
    ~Joseph Addison

  • I love you not only for what you are,
    but for what I am when I am with you.
    ~Elizabeth Barrett Browning

  • Grow old along with me
    The best is yet to be.
    ~Robert Browning

  • The simple lack of her is more to me than others’ presence.
    ~Edward Thomas

  • We are all born for love.
    It is the principle of existence, and its only end.
    ~Benjamin Disraeli

  • Love bears all things, believes all things,
    hopes all things, endures all things.
    ~The Bible : 1 Corinthians

  • Love is friendship set on fire.
    ~Jeremy Taylor

  • Love comforteth like sunshine after rain.
    ~William Shakespeare

  • The torch of love is lit in the kitchen.
    ~French Proverb

  • One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life:
    that word is love.
    ~Sophocles

  • Love is the master key which opens the gates of happiness.
    ~Oliver Wendell Holmes

  • You don’t marry someone you can live with,
    you marry the person who you cannot live without.
    ~Author unknown

  • Of all the earthly music, that which reaches farthest into heaven is the beating of a truly loving heart.
    ~Henry Ward Beecher

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21 Ways to Rekindle the Romance Fire

Rekindling romance fire in relationship is continuous issue and lasting intimacy comes from everyday appreciation and a reverence for the daily moments we spend in the company of one another.

These quotes are to give you the catalyst to fire up the romance fire that is fizzling out. Nevertheless you can CLICK HERE to discover everything you never knew about the opposite sex….. And the TOP Mistakes Most People make that Instantly Kills Attraction

Here are 21 simple ways you can demonstrate the depth of your love. (The words ‘he’ and ‘she’ had been used interchangeably here.)

 

1. Leave a message on her voicemail with a silly, romantic poem love poems.

2. Stash a love note in his shoe.

3. Buy her luxurious new silk pyjamas that will make her feel treasured and cherished each time she puts them on.

4. Listen without interrupting.

5. Watch a sporting event together.

6. Kiss him passionately.

7. Surprise him by purchasing his favorite DVD or the latest CD of his favorite vocal artist and make sure that you create time to watch or listen to it together no matter how tight the schedule may be.

8. Talk lovingly about your partner to others, and avoid criticizing your mate to your friends or family. Even if your words never make it back to your partner, the tension and negative energy will eventually wedge its way between you. This is a magic tool in strengthening relationship

9. Find time to take a walk together no matter how tight the schedule may be.

10. Rub his back

11. Re-create your first date to bring the feeling all over again

12. Write a love note and slip it under his pillow or any place that he can be caught unaware

13. Send a romantic text message to her while she is not with you. More interesting if she is in sitting room and you are on the lounge outside or in the bedroom. Just something to show that you are in love.

14. Rent a romantic movie and the two of you should watch it together

15. Have you been holding a grudge against your partner? Today, forgive it and move on. Witness how much power the act of forgiveness injects into your relationship. The power of forgiveness cannot be overestimated, it easily heal the wounds of ages.

16. Rub her feet.

17. Find creative places to write I Love you: in whipped cream on a slice of pie, carved into the side of an apple, in the steam on the bathroom mirror. and every place you can imagine.

18. Say Complementary things about her and to her, tell her she looks amazing.

19. Write her a love letter and mail it to her.

20. Frame one of the favourite photo of the two of you as a couple and frame two copies: one for each of you to take to work.

21. Jot down 21 things you love about him and slip it under his dinner plate.

For more information click here to download a free e book

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